10. Jay Melosh moves to Gould-Simpson, isostatic rebound of Kuiper Building begins9. Don Hunten shows no sign of retiring
8. Office space crunch due to incoming graduate student class of 37.
7. Custodians caught giving janitorial service to Uwe Fink's office
6. Drake's plan for invasion of Gittings thwarted by unexpectedly heavy resistance from fortified ballet troupe
5. Students found frozen in third floor offices; happily, new computers are OK
4. Y2K bug creates global chaos; atrium art begins working
3. President-elect Trump asks Gene Levy to be vice-president, says he "loved his work on SCTV"
2. Budgets revised and cut when it's discovered NASA accountants were doing calculations in English units rather than dollars and cents.
1. Last free parking space on campus declared National Historic Landmark.
10. Pluto Fast Flyby reaches Pluto9. Wildcat football team celebrates 200th consecutive year of not making the Rose Bowl
8. Completion of Freshman Learning Center again postponed, this time to May, 2107.
7. LPL department chair Stefan Geissler, Jr. finds last Easter egg on first day in Director's office
6. Aliens attempt to contact Earth via LPL, but find no compelling evidence for intelligent life.
5. LPL mosquitoes attain sentience, are admitted to graduate program
4. Amazon River Project completed; Tucson voters decide to use groundwater from wells sunk to the core-mantle boundary instead
3. Interstellar probe launched using "Gotobed-style" AI; Alpha Centauri flyby scrubbed due to "scheduled downtime"
2. Don Hunten still shows no sign of retiring
1. First LPL field trip to Mars considered a failure; spacecraft were returned "scratched and dirty"